last night

So last night was an amazing dinner at Monteray Bay at Mt. Washington with some great friends and my wonderful hubby. I did my workout yesterday (Max Plyo) and drank lots of water in hopes of burning extra calories through the day since our 60 day pictures are coming up tomorrow. I passed on the bread at dinner but had 3 glasses of wine. Every glass of wine I drank I drank at least 1 whole glass of water (Tosca tip!) I passed on the bread, had a strawberry side salad and Chilean sea bass with macadamia nuts and asparagus. The fish was sauteed in butter so that was a killer right there! I did have dessert (peach cheesecake) which was totally worth all the extra calories I consumed! It was an amazing dinner and I totally enjoyed every part of it. Today its back to my eating clean and drinking lots of water to get rid of those calories from yesterday! Today is max cardio and insane abs and I'll be kicking butt and preparing for pictures!
It was nice to see such great friends and feel so great in my body! I was so proud that I could fit into a size 2 (snug, but fit). I started out in a size 6 and I'm slowly getting back to a 2! Wohoo I can see that by the end of the summer I will fit into all my clothes! Love it!

Goals

Yesterday and today have been pretty down days for me. I am struggling with this weight and I'm starting to become depressed or just really sad about it. I just can't get what my mom said out of my head, "What does matt think about it". That comment was about how my stomach looks. I am such an instant gratification type of person that I am having such a hard time waiting around for results. I feel like I need to be doing more and taking more serious action. I know that I could be stricter with my diet, I could cut out cream in my coffee and cheese on my sandwich and the sour cream dollop on my dinner tonight. I should also focus on the good things that I did today. I passed up on the carmel popcorn and the junk food at lunch. I passed up on the free cheesecake at Costco. I also got a nice compliment from Melissa's friend. As far as it goes, I just need to stay focused and keep on pushing play. I am going to continue on and finish the next two weeks and then my goal is to build some muscle with p90x. My goal is to eat healthy and to feel confident in my skin by continuing to exercise and tone up my body!

Struggles and Successes

This weekend I spent Friday and Saturday at my parents house because Matt was at a bachelor party with his friends. It was mom's birthday on Friday and we were originally supposed to go to Idelwild but the weather was not cooperating. Instead we went to get pedicures and out to dinner and shopping at the mall. At dinner I bypassed the steak and ordered chicken with a sweet potato and salad. I did splurge on a margarita and a small ice cream cone at the mall. While mom and I were shopping I was trying on clothes in Ann Taylor and I finally was able to try clothes on and things were looking good. Wohoo I finally like shopping again. I was in the dressing room with my mom and I showed her my stomach. Her comment to me was, oh my, what does Matt think about it. She also said, do I think it will get better. I didn't know what to say. I told her that I thought I would need surgery to get rid of the extra skin. I also said that Matt doesn't say anything because he knows how much I am self conscious about it. On saturday I stuck to my diet except for the pasta salad for dinner and ice cream cake for Allison and mom's birthday. On Sunday it was back to reality and of course I spent the day beating myself up for all the bad choices that i made. I did my workout and focused on recovering. In a week I will feel better but then the weekend will come and I'll do the same thing all over again. I need strength to make it through the weekend without cheating! I am getting so close to finishing this workout and I can hardly wait to take my next pictures! This is the last week before my pictures so I need to stay focused and on target!!!

Doubles

Today i pulled a double workout with extreme cardio and zumba. I feel great but I'm really sore and my hips are going to be killing me tomorrow. I didn't realize that Zumba was going to work different muscles than the Insanity workout. Seriously, i didn't know that there were other muscles I could work. It feels great to say that I pulled a double workout today, but I know that I'm not going to get to workout tomorrow or Saturday. I'm headed to my parents for the weekend. I will stick to my eat clean principles and I'll make sure to stay focused as much as possible!
1. Think of a get healthy task you don't feel like doing. Ask yourself, why not? Take a moment to jot it down.
-At the moment I can't think of something that I need to do. I am already eating and exercising as much as I can. I just need to stay focused.
I really just want to get that smokin body so that I can turn heads and have people say that I look really good! No more flabby belly, that's the end result!

I finally finally got a compliment from my SIL. It wasn't a direct compliment but she asked to have my workout videos and my Eat Clean Diet. I asked her if she could tell that I lost weight and she said yes!
Yesterday was Matt's 30th Birthday and I did indulge in 2 glasses of red wine, 1 brownie and a piece of coconut cream pie. I did cook a clean meal for dinner and no one even realized that I did it. Everyone loved the shishcabobs(Spelling??) and I made bruschetta from Tosca Reno's blog. I couldn't find whole grain baguette at the specialty store so I had to buy white baguette. Its unbelieveable how hard healthy food is to find sometimes.
My beachbody coach asked our group to define our goals for the month of June. My goals are as follows.
To finish my insanity workout by July5th. Continue to refine my eating clean principles and get my family on board with the diet. To motivate my husband to eat clean and exercise. To loose at least 2 more pounds by the end of June. That would take my weight loss to 10 pounds. I really think it is possible, this eat clean diet and exercising are doing wonders for me! I would reccomend it to anyone, I feel great!

I am so so sore today, after completing week 1 of phase 2 I feel great but I am sore! I didn't know there were muscles I didn't work in the first 30 days. I love the core strenghtening and the upper body exercises. I love that Shaun T works our core so much, hopefully that will help with the baby pooch! I can really see that it is deflating slowly!! I am still pretty much obsessed with it though. I just can't get rid of it fast enough. This marks the beginning of week 3 of eating clean. It is becoming a lifestyle and I am realizing how bad that everyone around me eats. It is very hard to go out or go to dinner at families house because there is basically nothing I can eat. For fathers day yesterday we had steak, baked potatoes, corn, creamy fruit salad, and rolls. Nothing was on my diet except for the fruit. I did cut my steak in half and had a baked potatoe, corn and fruit. I was still pretty hungry afterwards. I did have a piece of my mom's homemade strawberry pie. I drank water and stayed away from the appetizers. I even passed up on the taco dip, which is my favorite! I still didn't receive any compliments from that side of the family but I'm guessing that I never will. I just don't think they are ones to point out accomplishments on weight loss. Bryce hasn't been taking very good afternoon naps for the past 3 days so hopefully today I will get my workout in. I definately need to workout everyday. I just feel like a better person. I am so excited to reach my goal and have that totally awesome body! I can just feel the confidence building each day. That is motivation enough for me!

Last night we celebrated Matt's 30th birthday with a suprise party at the Hard Rock Cafe. We had a great time with lots of drinks and food. I gave in and drank poison aka alcohol and today I'm feeling the effects. I have a headache and I feel exhausted. Or it could be from the the lunch that I ate. It consisted of a red robin spinach bbq chicken wrap and french fries. It was so delicious but it is not a clean mean and I'm sure that's part of my icky feelings. I did Max Plyo Circuit today and burned off my drinks from last night, but then my lunch cancelled that out. No rest day for me tomorrow because of my poor choices in eating. I also feel like if I take a day off its harder for me to get going the next day when exercising. I love that feeling of completing a workout and being covered in total sweat. Its like I just gave my body a happy pill for the day. It also keeps me in check for the rest of the day in eating good.
My brother said he can also tell a big difference, he said my abs are looking good! So far he has been my biggest fan and motivator. Thanks Bro for noticing all of my hardwork. Well, tonight we are having a cookout so I'm taking fruit and sticking to my plan! I might end up eating a burger but I'll skip the bun!

Goals

So I was exercising today and thinking about what my goals for the next six months should be and this is what I have come up with.
My long term goal is to have a 6 pack and to be able to wear all of my pre-pregnancy clothes with a flat stomach.
Short Term goal: (by 7/31/2011) hit my goal weight of 119 pounds. I am only 10 pounds away right now. That is totally doable.
Short Term Goal: Transform my eating habits into Eat Clean principles.
Short Term Goal: Complete Insanity Workout (7/10/2011)
Short Term Goal: Complete P90X workout (10/1/2011)

Update

Today is day 3 of month 2 of the Insanity workout. I think today was the equivalent of Pure cardio and I'm still feeling it! Geez kids, I was sweating and working so hard today. I felt great after my workout. I love it that we are doing so much abs work and core strengthening. I feel that is really what I need to get my stomach flatter. Although, I am concerned that it is never going to go away. I am trying to be optimistic but I just feel stuck. I do love working out and I love the rush I get after I finish a workout. I love being able to say to other people that I am active and am sticking to a plan. I really am excited to see what the next 3o day pictures show. Hopefully a huge improvement. I am trying to stick to the Eat Clean Diet but it is very hard. Today I ate my egg whites, oatmeal coffee and water. No snack beacuse I was out with the kids and didn't think about eating. For lunch I had a cliff bar and a bowl of soup from dinner last night. After my workout was a protein shake and dinner was a grilled chicken sandwich from Dairy Queen with lettuce and tomatoe and a glass of water. I did finish Landon's baby cone, but it was only a few bites. For a snack I had an apple and almond butter and water. I am still hungry but I'm trying not to think about it. I am going to bed! I am also working on weening Bryce from nursing, so hopefully that will help with the weight loss!

feeling down

Well today is day 2 of month 2 of my Insanity workout. Today was a hard day because I woke up with a headache and little energy to do much of anything. I ate my egg whites and oatmeal with a glass of water and coffee for breakfast. For a snack I had an apple and almond butter and lunch was a cliff bar (probally a bad choice) salad with leftover balsamic chicken from last night and fresh veggies, I measured out 1 tablespoon of rasperry pecan dressing. For a snack I had hummus and sugar snap peas. For dinner I made a bean and chicken soup. I passed up on the bread and had a handful of craisins. For a snack I splurged on ice cream from a local place (it was frozen yogurt). Still not the best choice but I enjoyed it! I am really beating myself up over the weekends choices on food. I feel like I'm starting over again, I feel like my stomach is protruding outward like I'm 5 months pregnant. I keep looking at people's results from these workouts and I think to myself that I am never going to get there. I just don't see that my body is making a transformation. But then today when I was working out I could see my calf and thigh muscles while I was doing the workout. That is totally something new to me, and I don't ever think I've had muscles like that before. I can also feel my oblique muscles, but still not muscles in the middle of my stomach and definately a bulge of fat and extra skin!
Today, my friend told me that she could see a difference in my arms and legs! Yay, but I need my stomach to go away. I guess I just need to keep drinking my water and eating clean. I'm going to keep at it even if it kills me! Need sleep, I'm extra tired today!

Monday

Today starts a new day, a new week and a new phase of my Insanity workout. I tried to start last night but after a weekend full of eating bad and not drinking enough water I felt like a bloated jelly donut. I could hardly get my feet off the ground to workout and I thought I was going to puke on the floor. I called it quits after 25 minutes and decided I would start fresh today. So it's Monday and now I am actually scared to do that same workout again. Eventhough I was really tired it was still really really hard. I also feel like I have to start out from day 1 because I treated my body so badly this weekend. I never realized how important it is to eat healthy clean foods in order to feel good. I do feel that sugar is a type of drug, it weights you down and leaves you feeling empty. I am going back to my strick eating clean today!

Feeling icky

This weekend was our first trip to Deep Creek lake with my family. We left on Friday and I got in my last recovery workout before we left. I had 1 day off and today I did my first workout of Month 2. Let me just tell you I started out my weekend eating clean as much as possible. But yesterday I ate cake, mountain pies and a cookie. Today I had french toast cassarole, turkey bacon and eggs with cheese for breakfast. Lunch was good, but dinner was steak, potatoes and more cake for dessert. I just couldn't say no to coconut cream pie! So needless to say I feel nausous and I couldn't even complete my Max interval circuit becuase I felt like I had lead in my shoes and I was sick to my stomach. I feel pretty bad about myself at the moment and I'm all bloated and gross! I just want to crawl into bed and start over tomorrow! I think that's my plan and I'm not going to beat myself up over it! Goodnight!

Slip Ups

Well I was doing very well until yesterday when Matt decided that I needed to eat almond torte cake for dessert. It all started with Matt inviting a vendor from work over for dinner. He wanted steak and I chose to eat fish (salmon) with olive oil, lemon salt and pepper. I made baked potatoes for the guys and a sweet potatoe for myself. I had freshe zuchinni and a salad. I did drink wine but I followed Tosca's rule of 1 glass of water for every glass of wine. Then my husband brought out the dessert and cut me a piece and put it in front of me. It was like he was purposefully sabatoging me. It wasn't fair, I didn't have the will power to say no. To make matters worse, Landon didn't eat his piece so I ate his. WTF!!!!! This is why I don't even buy this stuff, I can't say no. I felt horrible the rest of the night and today I actually feel sick to my stomach. It's back to eating clean today and extra workouts! I need to stay focused!! I can do it and I feel great when I stick to my rules!
Each day is a new begining and I'm trying not to beat myself up over it!

Day 3

I'm begining Day 3 of the Eat Clean Diet. I am doing Great!!!! I have lost 2 pounds since Monday, AMAZING! Yesterday I did not cheat at all. Yesterday I ate my oatmeal with flax seed, blueberries, 2 egg whites, water and black coffee. Snack was an apple with 2 tablespoons of almond butter. Lunch was a whole wheat tortilla with hummus, red peppers, lettuce, tomotoe, and turkey and a banana. Snack was a chocolate chip cliff bar (not really on the diet) and dinner was chicken caggitore from last night. My late snack was a cup of cottage cheese, rasberries and almonds. I didn't drink anything other than the 1 cup of coffee and water! I felt awesome and had a great sense of accomplishment. I also went to the mall and returned a size 28 pair of shorts and bought at 27! I also bought a pair of capris in a size smaller than I was pre Bryce! My tummy is starting to look smaller already! I can't believe how much of a difference it makes when you just cut out the sugar you are eating! I am already preparing for the weekend and thinking about how I can take food with me to stay focused! Wohoo!

Day1

So today begins day 2 of my eating clean diet. Yesterday I went to the grocery store and stocked up on all of my fresh fruits and veggies. I make chicken cagatorie from an eat clean website and it was delicious! The hardest part of yesterday was not putting sugar in my cofee and no brown sugar in my oatmeal. I thought I was going to die without the sugar. But this morning wasn't as hard! It actually tasted good. I ate 2 hard boiled egg whites instead of 4, but I'm working up to that. I am reading my book and staying motivated to eat clean! The only slip ups yesterday were a glass of sweet wine, a handful of fruit snacks and some popcorn at the movies last night. Yesterday was an extremely tough day since my kids were extra grumpy, I did succomb to emotional/comfort eating! Today will be better and I'll keep pushing forward. I did day 2 of my recovery workout and I feel great, I love the core strenghtening exercises! Goal for this month is to loose 5 pounds, anything extra is a bonus.
This weekend we are going to Deep Creek MD with my family. My goal is to eat clean and bypass all the yummy sweet treats that people will bring. I am going to plan my meals ahead of time and take food with me! I CAN DO IT!

Eat Clean diet start up

So today I started my diet by drinking my coffee with only cream and no sugar and oatmeal with no brown sugar, just blueberries and flax seed and a hard boiled egg! I can't say that it was the tastiest breakfast but I'm sure I will get used to it. For a snack I had 1 apple with 1 tablespoons of almond butter. For lunch I had a whole wheat tortilla with turkey, hummus, roasted red peppers, lettuce and tomatoe. It was pretty tasty. For my preworkout snack I had a cliff bar. So far I feel pretty good except that my children were up from 5:30am on. I am tired today because I went to bed to late! I got my workout it today and now Im going to sit down and read my Eat Clean diet book and plan out my meals. I hit up the grocery store for lots of fresh veggies, so hopefully I can make a difference and start seeing some changes! I'm pretty psyched!

Eat Clean diet

I finally finished my 30 days of the Insanity workout. I definately feel much stronger and in shape that I have ever felt. It's not even a question in my mind whether or not I am going to workout each day. I just put the kids down for a nap and head to the basement to do my workout. I always feel recharged and satisfied with my workouts. I love sweating and knowing that I am pushing myself to having a better body. I have noticed changes in my body but I'm still a little frustrated with the number on the scale. I turned to my 90 day summer slim down challenge friends for some advice. I got a lot of feedback regarding the Shakeology and Eat Clean diet. I think I'm going to try the Eat Clean diet and change the way my entire family eats. I really struggle with eating sweets and snacks to late at night. My goal this week is to drink more water each day and cut out at least 1 tablespoon of sugar in my cofee. I downloaded the eat clean diet regarched book to my IPAD and I plan on following that as much as possible. Hopefully I will start to see the pounds come off! I really want to end this challenge and feel great about myself. I already feel good about my progress and my dedication and every day I think about what I'm going to do after I finish the Insanity program. I'm between the RevAbs or P90X. I'd like to definately get my stomach flat (I don't need a 6 pack, but atleast I don't want to look 5 months pregnant anymore) and build some muscle in my arms! I made my grocery list and tomorrow I will go and get everything I need for this weeks recipes! Wish me luck, because I'm going to need it!

The day I've been waiting for

Well I got my first compliment from my husband yesterday! He said that I looked really good. I have been waiting for that compliment for 30 days. Its great to hear the person that you see everyday finally notice your hard work and efforts! I definately needed that because yesterday I felt like I wasn't looking better and the scale actually went up 1/2 pound. I have been cutting more and more out of my diet and I'm still not loosing weight. I also fell off the wagon yesterday. After Matt was gone for the entire week and I was home alone with the boys I needed some drinks! So my neighbor and I had some mohito's and I ate a big burrito from On the Border. I'm pretty sure I just killed yesterday's workout! Today's a new day and I will work hard today! I also did a double workout yesterday, I walked with the boys to the park, did Pure Cardio and Cardio Abs!! Today I am going to the mall to return some clothes and get a smaller size since I'm loosing weight in my butt and legs! Wohoo, can't wait for day 60! I love that I am motivated to exercise and love seeing results!

Sore and baggy

Well today was a good day besides the fact that my little Bryce woke up at 6am and was a grumpy son of a gun today. I got in my workout and I felt great afterwards. I really didn't think I was going to get to workout today because the kids were grumpy. I did the plyo cardio circuit and was able to do most of the video with high energy. I am having a hard time with my ankles. They really hurt in the morning and now in the evening. I don't know if i'm pounding the pavement to hard or what? Also, I finally noticed today that my clothes are big. My jean capri's are really baggy and my fav black lounging pants are so baggy that I can't wear them out anymore! Wohoo, that's so exciting! I just wish my stomach would shrink faster, I have a feeling that is going to be the last place it goes away. Tomorrow is the cardio recovery so hopefully I can give my body a rest!
Today I ate, whole wheat english muffin and almond butter for breakfast with my cup of coffee. For lunch I ate a cliff bar and an apple. For dinner I had a small filet, baked potatoe, green beans, and fresh fruit. For a snack I had cottage cheese with blueberries and a small handful of granola. I also had a protein shake with strawberries after I exercised. I think I did pretty good today! I am still kind of hungry tonight and I definately didn't drink enough water. Tomorrow my goal is to drink more water!!

Pictures

Yesterday was the day we were supposed to post our pictures to the facebook page. I just couldn't do it! I just am not ready to show the world what my stomach looks like. It just makes me sick to think of what I had before I had kids. I know that I should feel blessed to have 2 healthy kids but my body image is so important to me. I don't know how to overcome this overwhelming obsession with my body. It is so bad that it affects my daily life! Although, I am motivated to make a change. I am very curious to know if my body will look noticeably different after this 90 days. Yesterday I cut back on the amount of food that I ate and I noticed a difference in my energy level in the afternoon and also I was extremely hungry in the evening. I ate a whole wheat english muffin with almond butter and a banana for breakfast with a cup of coffee. For lunch I ate a Clif energy bar and fruit with a bottle of water. After my workout I had a protein shake with fresh strawberries and blueberries. For dinner I had 1 piece of teryaki baked chicken, zuchinni and peas. For a snack I had fruit and a 100 calorie lemon dessert parfait. I was starving in the middle of the night and I was tired all evening.
My current concern is that I am eating enough because I am still nursing Bryce. I have decided to ask my brother for assistance since he went to school for health and fitness. I will keep you posted on my progress. Yesterday I got on the scale and I was down to 131.5, wohoo another pound down!
I just have to keep focused, because I am sore and I want to give up! But I know the end result will pay off! I am trying to decide what my reward should be at the end of this challenge. Should I get a new outfit, facial, new exercise video? Jury is still out!
God give me the courage to change what I can change and embrace what I cannot change!